I once wrote:
I am often leery of writing anything of what might be called substance because I am so often wrong. I'll read a book and murmur, "Oh....yes...yes..." then read a opposing review on the book and realize, "Oh...yes...I missed that. Ah, indeed!” It’s not just the backlash and derision I’m scared of -- although that itself is certainly cause for hesitancy -- but of being wrong. And by that I don't mean just the possibility of misleading people, but being wrong in and of itself. Integrity involves wanting to do right because it is right; not to be superior, not to prove a point, but because right is right.
Today I saw:
A major concern for INTPs is the haunting sense of impending failure. They spend considerable time second-guessing themselves. The open-endedness (from Perceiving) conjoined with the need for competence (NT) is expressed in a sense that one's conclusion may well be met by an equally plausible alternative solution, and that, after all, one may very well have overlooked some critical bit of data. An INTP arguing a point may very well be trying to convince himself as much as his opposition.
While I almost always score as an INFJ on those types of quizzes, and much of an INTP's description is totally unlike me, my written paragraph is essentially a paraphrase of the latter description paragraph. I thought it was a matter of integrity and now I find it's a matter of type (and a previously unknown type, or half-type, at that). Or is it? Did I score that way because of my aims toward integrity?
The application of such goes much deeper than just the "I'm like this" aspect, but I need to wrestle with these thoughts more before articulating them. I guess such wrestling is a lifelong doom.
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p.s. The fact that it took me a good portion of an hour to get that last paragraph right is a telling sign. Or is it just that I'm a writer who needs to get her words just right...?
4 comments:
interesting! Dad has some of those traits too... It takes him a long time to write an email or even to do a translation. It has to be expressed exactly right...
Fascinating. And greetings from an INTJ. :)
I went and read up on INTJs. Interesting! What did you score on OM's temperament test, if they give those out there? (The Doer, Thinker etc one.)
But now I feel I have to reiterate that INTP is only part of me; lest people think INTP is all, I must say I'm also very much an INFJ:
INFJ's can be hard to get to know. They have an unusually rich inner life, but they are reserved and tend not to share their reactions except with those they trust. With their loved ones, certainly, they are not reluctant to express their feelings, their face lighting up with the positive emotions, but darkening like a thunderhead with the negative. Indeed, because of their strong ability to take into themselves the feelings of others, Counselors can be hurt rather easily by those around them, which, perhaps, is one reason why they tend to be private people, mutely withdrawing from human contact. At the same time, friends who have known a Counselor for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that they are inconsistent; Counselors value their integrity a great deal, but they have intricately woven, mysterious personalities which sometimes puzzle even them.
Gotta get these things exactly right, y'know. But that's the INTP part.
Yeah, I find this stuff fascinating, though always take it with a grain of salt - it's nice to know that God allows us to fit in general boxes at times, but otherwise we are very unique!
At the GO conferences for newbies to OM, we look at Chip Kirk's personality test - where you are either mainly Driver, Motivator, Harmoniser or Detailer. I'm pretty much 100% Driver! Scary stuff!
I've found from doing different tests over the years that it's SCARY how accurate they can be for me, since I seem to be quite dominant in one group rather than split out over two or three, as many are. But the most helpful thing for me is seeing how other people see my personality - especially the 'warts' part!! And it's good to get a sense of where we rub people the wrong way, even without intending to, so at least we can try and be more sensitive.
That's what I think anyway, coming from a not-known-to-be-very-sensitive personality type!!!
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